Day 12 Breaking Down and Building Up

"It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are."~ Roy Disney

My body is reeeally starting to feel the effects of the intense training. Since Sunday night I've been waking up in the middle of the night soaked in sweat, which always seems to happen the night after a hard workout. I had a friend who is a cyclist who had the same thing happen, he called it "riding fever". I've got Fran fever. or CrossFit fever. I went to open gym last night after work with the intention of doing my homework again from last week of 18-12-6 65lb thrusters....but then I saw the workout posted for today of 800 meter run and 100 Shoulder to overhead with the RX weight of 95lbs. So I worked on my pull-ups instead...and my double unders. The good news is I can string together 10 pull-ups in a row! Bad news is my double unders are still sucking. Double unders and running, my weakest links. But I have a plan to remedy that.

I broke yesterday and had a bagel (once again brought by the evil drug reps). Yes, I was super hungry, but I don't think not having it would have killed me. I'm slipping up more and more on the nutrition, but I'm to have a phone call from my coach later today to go over just that and I have a feeling I will get a pretty solid verbal smack. But, in all fairness, I shouldn't need an outside influence to get me to nail my nutrition, it has to come from me, otherwise where is the growth? It's an exercise in mental strength. I think of it like working a muscle, if you don't work it...it won't get stronger. Same with resisting cheats. If I'm not practising saying no...how do I expect it to become a lifestyle? I should know better. I'm tired. My body is in a constant state of tightness/soreness and I am definitely getting snappy at work. The energy I was depending on using to resist all the temptations isn't really there. So it's time to dig a little deeper, because I have it in me.

Am I over training? Maybe. Am I under resting? Oh yea. 12 hour shifts on your feet do not complement this. And since the crazy expensive car repairs, I've been picking up extra shifts. It's rough, but I'm only doing that for 3 weeks. I think of all the moms out there. Women who are getting by on a few hours of sleep here and there, running households, raising kids, working, trying to get 1 min to pee in privacy...and I think, you know, I've got it pretty easy. I have a husband and a cat and the only thing that's keeping me from getting at least 7 hours of sleep a night is discipline. Some nights I could even get more if I wanted. I have every food I could possible want at my fingertips because this is America, land of excess. I have no excuse not to feed my body the best nutrients. I have no excuse not to get adequate sleep at night. All that's stopping me from excelling...is me. So I broke down a little these past few days. Now it's time to build back up.